Let's face it, we have ALL had days where we felt like slamming an adult bully's face into a brick wall, or backing over the neighborhood bully's skateboard. It's whether or not we do it, though, that tells our children/teens what kind of people we are, and shows them what kind of people to be. Yesterday afternoon I had a moment of pure, unadulterated, righteous anger in defense of my children and nearly failed in my example. This morning as I was reflecting on that situation and how at my weakest moment yesterday I was able to show God's grace and forgiveness, I remembered one very similar situation from over 7 years ago that I though was worth sharing.
Our youngest has a high functioning ASD and also has a severe anxiety disorder so he often makes twitchy movements and jerks when he is agitated, spins in circles or spins his head when he can't move his body full circle, stares at the ceiling, and begins to move his lips to the counting in his head. While this is often disconcerting to those around him, I typically tune everything and everyone out and focus on helping him calm down. When he was younger, it was extremely difficult to do this and often took hours, and even days.
When he was a little over 2, we were doing our weekly shopping trip and another little boy, about 5 or 6, began to point and stare at the birthmark on our son's left cheek. The boy went from staring to jumping up and down like a monkey and pretending to throw stuff at my son. He then exclaimed in laughter to his parent that my son moved like a monkey at the zoo and asked if that was that poop on his face. Our son was so upset by this that he began to slam himself around in the seat of the cart wiggling it back and forth. After about 15 minutes, I ended up having to pick him up and cradle him completely into me under a blanket just to get him to stop slamming around, though he was still twitching and craning his head. It was then that I realized the little boy was staring, open mouthed at us in silence, refusing to budge as his parent tried to walk him away.
Naturally at first, I was furious. Then I noticed that the poor parent looked completely ashamed and embarrassed. As they continued to try and hustle their little guy away, I asked if I could answer the questions about our son. I then told the little boy the same story that we have told our son and his siblings since he was born about his birthmark, and since he was diagnosed at 8 months old about the anxiety and ASD:
When God puts the miracle of each baby into their mommy's tummy, the babies pass a row of Angels on their way from Heaven to earth the moment before they are conceived. Each Angel gives each baby a special gift - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. At the very end of the line of angels, Jesus is waiting to hug each baby and St. Peter is waiting to kiss each one. (My sister and I got pregnant within a week of each other, and my niece has the same shaped birthmark as our son but on her forehead and much smaller.) So as the babies were filing past, my son got a bit anxious to be in my tummy so he pushed his cousin into St. Peter, causing the kiss to get her forehead and not her cheek as she passed. As soon as our son finished his hug with Jesus, he ran by St. Peter with his face turned up and cheek pointed toward St. Peter, who just managed to smack one on our son's lower cheek as he whizzed by. St. Peter had to work so hard to give him that kiss that it ended up leaving a mark, a special reminder of how much God loves us.
Our son is also a special reminder of how much God loves us because God gave him something extra to let him hear and feel everything a little more than most people. It's like how the antennae on the tv picks up extra stuff that the tv doesn't by itself; well, our son has an Extra Special Antenna. He is very smart, and understands a lot of things about numbers and shapes and colors even though he is very little that many other people do not understand even when they're older. Sometimes when he is upset about something and we pray over him, he will suddenly stop and smile, grunting as though he can feel Jesus hugging him. He always helps our family to remember just how special God makes ALL of us, and how much He loves each and every one of us, before we are even born!
When I finished, the little boy was fascinated and asked if he could touch the Kiss. As I was telling the story our son had heard so many times already, he calmed down and was then just staring at the other boy inquisitively. I let the little guy touch our son's cheek, and he let out a giggle of pure joy. When I looked up, the parent had tears in their eyes and thanked me. Then the two of them walked away, hand in hand, with the little guy rubbing his own cheek over and over.
Every day that I spend with our son is like a precious gift. They are not without challenges, yet the rewards are so much bigger because our God is so much bigger!!! Today, when people stare, our son looks straight at them and asks, "What's the big deal? Haven't you seen an Angel Kiss before?"
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